How Could I forget...AGAIN!?

Once again, I messed my poll question up. Like the other poll when I forgot Carlos LOOOOOOOOOOOOZER, I forgot to include Brooklyn as a choice of most tortured. I mean they had all the things happen that Cleveland has suffered through. Heartbreakers multiple times. Teams leaving. Same team knocking them out. Memorable plays to get knocked out. Blown leads. Ouch.

Of course, I won't be singing this same tune in two years when the Nets move there and take LeBron and win multiple championships with him earning him a hall of fame induction in which he will enter with a Nets jersey instead of his hometown Cavs'.

So I guess I'm not that sorry. Or at least I won't be in the future. They will get theirs and us Clevelanders will remain the butt of jokes and stuck in the quicksand of sports lore.

Cavs Wrap Up

Ok. It has been a couple of days. I think I can do this. Here are some of my random thoughts regarding the Cavs' 07-08 season and the current state of the team.

Season in Review
My knee jerk reaction has been that the season was a failure. Even objectively one can say that it was a disappointment since the only way to match or improve on last season would be to win it all since they made it to the Finals. They did not do that. So it should be deemed a failure.

But let's examine the season a bit closer. This year they ran into a Celtic team that was "supposed" to win. They had three bonafide all stars. The Cavs were right there in the end. One could argue they looked better in their losses than Boston looked in theirs. But that is splitting hairs and meaningless really. They lost.

There were more important factors.

First, they had a 10 day trip to China in the preseason. That may not sound like a lot but it affects you. I believe their slow start was due, in part, to the adjustment that needed to be made following the trip.

Second, the holdouts of Pavlovic and Andy were detrimental had a negative impact as well. They both played large roles in the prior season's success. Missing them hurt in general as well as in setting the rotation for the season and building chemistry and rhythm. It was a domino effect that lasted longer than it should have.

Also, there were injuries to important pieces at critical times and for long periods of time. These injuries did not allow for the rotation to be set, chemistry to be built or any kind of rhythm to be set. And obviously injuries keep key contributors from contributing.

Finally, the big trade midseason was also a tough obstacle. The new players coming in needed to gel and learn their roles on this team. The remaining players needed to adjust to new roles. The coaching staff and team as a whole had to figure out how to replace the skill sets of the departed players with the skill sets of the new players and remaining players. And once again, chemistry, rhythm and a rotation needed to be reset.....halfway through the season in time for the playoffs.

So the Cavs had so much to deal with not to mention the lack of any offensive (AGAIN) plan by their defensive head coach.

Taking all of this into account one can say this season was not that bad. But honestly, I just don't feel as good about where we stand as a team right now as I did last summer.

State of the Cavs
I am unclear how this offseason will go. I keep hearing how expiring contracts are gold and we have a bunch. Therefore, supposedly, we have a number of tradeable players. I just don't see it. I don't know what Ferry can do this offseason. If he can eleviate the team of the contracts of Wally, Smith, Jones and Snow then we may be in business. Personally I would like to see Joe Smith stay. I like the idea of keeping West and resigning Gibson. Both have too much potential. West really showed me something as became more aggressive and comfortable. He finally learned James wants him to take shots and not defer to the King all the time.

I was very negative at first, but now I wonder what would have happened if this team played a full season together. What if they knew their roles? What if they could enter a season together and stay together? Could they have won more games and get a higher seed earning home court and winning the Boston series? You know Boston wasn't gonna win a game seven in Cleveland. Then again, I doubt they would have won more than Boston's 66 games to get homecourt against them. But maybe Detroit. Maybe a Conference Final berth against the Celtics. Hmmm. Is this the key? A better regular season? Better post season position? Isn't what got them to the Finals last year the easy road through the playoffs? Of course, Detroit wasn't easy. Being down 0-2 to Detroit even harder. But they won in six. I still like to call that the 6 game sweep.

All in all, I do not feel as bad as I did earlier in the week. But as the weather in Ohio, that could change before I finish this sentence. I don't feel good either though. If Ferry blows up this team, I may not have a problem. As long as the moves make sense. Unlike the know-nothing-about-the-NBA local sports radio guys here in Columbus, I believe in Ferry. I like what he has done. I am going to trust him.

So let's see what he does. And drafting Koufos (Ohio State) at #19 is NOT a good idea. I called it first.

Go Cavs!

Softball pt 2.

I have deliberately avoided posting my weekly softball updates. Partly due to the fact I doubt anyone cares. But mostly due to my absolutely, no question about it, HORRID start to the season.

I ended fall ball in '07 discovering some hidden power. Not fence busting power but gap power that allowed my so so speed to race around the bases for stand up home runs. At first, I thought it was a fluke but it happened numerous times on two different teams. So I entered this season with excitement and eager anticipation.

I promptly started off with driblers back to the pitcher, swings and misses and easy pop outs. I NEVER SWING AND MISS SOFTBALL PITCHES!!!! So I have played with my stance, tried to analyze my swing, begged teammates for observations and advice but ended up with the same crap. And I noticed my teammates in the same quandry as they were hitting into easy outs. Oh, this was frustrating.

But my friends!!!!! Tonight that changed. BAck in my familiar surroundings of Hilliard, Ohio, I let loose for several hits, a lucky error by the shortstop and...ladies and gentlemen drums please: A homerun to the opposite field...kinda. It was right center but that counts for scrubs like me. They played me for a punk and I made them pay.

Yeeeeeeeeeeeah. They better recognize!

I am very lucky...

You have read me wax on about my Huey Karma. If you know me, you have heard me talk pessimistically about things in my life. I mentioned in the past I have had horrible luck when things go wrong inexplicably. My parents have spun it another way by stating how it could be considered good luck because these "bad" things could have easily been much worse. Plus, there are many people in the world with situations or events MUCH worse.

Agreed.

But I feel I am lucky for other reasons as well. I met a woman 12 years ago that has proven my good fortune. It was a chance meeting playing on the same coed softball team at Ohio State. Common conversation led to some common ground. Thus began a friendship that meandered through a number of different periods. We both followed different paths over the next decade never straying too far from one another to lose touch. But never able to get too close due to our other relationships.

Over the following decade we lived in different states. We would go months without talking. We lived contrasting lifestyles. I was married. I had a kid. But something kept us in contact with one another. Sometimes it would not be a conscious or tangible connection. We just never let go of each other's email or phone number. Even with no emails or calls to one another, we kept them.....just in case I suppose.

Then when our friendship was probably at its most minimal in terms of communication, I found myself in need of her without really realizing this specifically. We just so happened to find each other again. As luck would have it, She was one who could best help me in this time of need. A simple voicemail to touch base turned into daily emails and intentional visits.

So at precisely the same time, we reached low points in our lives. Then we just so happened to be back to hanging out and talking regularly like the first summer we knew each other. Coincidence? Luck? In my case I had many loving people rally behind me during my low point. That alone shows the good fortune I have. I have had some wonderful relationships in my life. My family, my friends, my work colleagues, they all supported me in their own unique ways and helped make a difficult time for me rather easy. My friend also found a support system that has helped her. But the person who ended up playing the largest role for me was this friend working through her own difficulty.

Now this woman is my wife. She has gone from a good friend to more of an acquantice to my closest, most trusted relationship. She has been a tremendous role model to my daughter. She has been so loving and understanding of me. She tries so hard to be the best she can be taking it one day at a time. She has dealt with all my character defects and numerous stresses that come with entering a relationship with someone who already has a child in stride, with eloquence I could never mimic.

I have so much respect for this angel. I love her with all my heart. I give her the best and worst of me and she takes it all. She motivates me and makes me a better person despite my resistance much of the time.

Somehow she sees something in me to go through so much and stay. She has dropped everything to move to Columbus with me. That is not easy. She is basically starting her whole life over down here. I am so appreciative of this. I couldn't bear moving away from my daughter. I can barely go overnight without seeing her when she is with her mom. My loving wife knows this and has allowed me this luxury. I am forever grateful. Now she shares this as she begins to love my daughter and build a wonderful relationhsip with her.


I am so lucky that at just the right time she and I reconnected. A year earlier, a year later and that would not have happened. Had we tried to take our friendship in another direction at any point in that decade we may never had had this opportunity. We would just be memories to each other. But that never happened.

That's some good karma.

May

Why has May been so cold the past decade? It used to be my favorite month. The weather used to be so perfect. It would be warm without the humidity and scoring sun of June and July or dryness of August. But recently, May has been frigid. And September has been hot.

I think it must be global warming. The seasons have shifted, May is the new April and September is the new August.

Get past LeBron...PLEASE!!!

I have a number of things in my head regarding my Cleveland Cavaliers and their second round playoff series against the Boston Celtics. As of this post they are down 2-0 and James is STRUGGLING. I can't cap it enough! Boston has found a way to not only stop him but shut him down. Their defense is much like San Antonio's last year in the Finals. They double him and slide a zone in his direction taking away the easy lanes for layups or dunks and forcing him to make jumpers. He hasn't. You have to hand it to the Celtics and their coaching staff. If only "The Squint" Mike Brown could coach like that.........

Here are my thoughts:
**If LeBron isn't hitting his outside shot and the Celt's are taking away the ability to drive aggressively, why not post him up? We all know you need to drive to the hoop if your shot doesn't go. Brown and James know that too. You can see LeBron trying to drive. You can hear Brown reference it in his interviews. Unfortunately in the same breath that Brown says driving to the rim is the right thing to do, he also states LeBron should still shoot and if he misses five in a row not to hesitate the sixth time to shoot the open jumper. (The Plain Dealer) I understand not messing with the confidence of your most important player, especially in this situation where he is so way off with his shot that it is most likely in his head and you need to avoid making that worse. But after 5 misses in a row keep shooting anyway? That scares me. Hopefully LeBron knows better.

So why can't LeBron set up in the block and post up Pierce or whoever is guarding him? Try it with a smaller lineup. Maybe Boobie, Wally, West and Z with James. For the record: feel free to switch Wally out of that for another guard type player. But keep it small to give room down low. Z will gladly fade out of James' way. This way things won't be clogged for James when he posts up. Of course you don't want Z roaming too far out because if LeBron can so much as get it on the rim Ilgauskas can tip a miss back in. Z lives off that and I'm fine with it. Can James post up even if he passes out of the post once they double team him? Is that the problem? Is passing our of the block too difficult for LeBron? Could be. He is big, but not 7 feet. I'd like to see it though. At least mix it up and hopefully open some things up with some variety. I am tired of this awful, middle school offense.

***Do we really have to buy into this "LeBron and the rest of the team" mentality? Do we really have to believe LeBron doesn't have a "pippen" or anything? I think the team is now believing it. I think they are buying into the media's insistent message that this team is nothing beyond James. They very well might be. I am not going to argue that point one bit. This isn't my point. My point is: Does the team have to believe it right or wrong, true or not?

Regardless of whether this is the Cleveland LeBronaliers or not, the team can't think that way. They must believe they are legit players. And they can justify it. Gibson showed last year he can shoot, drive and make free throws as well as get hustle plays and timely steals. Z has more than proven over ten plus years than he can score. He can be a legit threat as long as he is out of foul trouble. Devin Brown gets hard work buckets. Delonte West does well when he stays aggressive. Sasha and Wally are hit and miss but one of them can get hot. Joe Smith is gritty and has a nice baseline, mid range jumper. Andy should never touch the ball unless passing to someone or rebounding misses. AND WHERE THE HECK IS DAMON JONES?!!!!

The Cavs must think in their heads they are more than LeBron. They cannot sit there and expect him to make it happen and wait for him to pass them the ball. They can't rely on him to find his shot again or wait for him to find it. Let's just assume he is never going to shoot well again and figure out how to win despite that.

****AND WHERE THE BLEEP IS DAMON JONES?! I know he has issues. I know his defense is lacking and the Cavs have actually played decent defense this first two games. That has been lost in this mess with James. They have held the Big Three to under 90 points both games. But with no offense you can't win these games. So.....get some offense! Amon Jones has found his J this year. In past years I would have been thrilled to see Amon trapped at the end of the bench, but now that he can shoot again and we need something, anything......get him out there!!!!

*****I still love my Cleveland Cavaliers.

Why I Can't Be Buddhist

I still have so much to read regarding Buddhism. But I already know I would never be able to become Buddist myself. Let me try to simply and correctly explain why this is so.

The goal of Buddhism seems to be to reach enlightenment or nirvana. To do this one must eliminate all desires. According to Buddha who became enlightened himself, desire is the root of all suffering. At the core I am completely on board with this thinking. I do not question the validity of his preachings one bit. Where I have a problem is that I cannot give up things I desire. I just cannot.

I look at it this way. A person who has grown up and become very successful and rich is able to understand that the lifestyle they live is limiting. The happiness they feel is superficial and temporary always leading to the need or desire to get more, regain it after it wears out or look for a new pleasure. They realize that if they were to quit these things and simplify their life by giving away their money and unnecessary possessions and devoting themselves to other people instead of parties and shallow pleasures, they would be truly happy and satisfied. Unfortunately they cannot give up those pleasures. Those pleasures no matter how shallow or temporary they are make them happy. They are comfortable with the constant search or struggle with obtaining these pleasures.

That is where I am at. I don't want to give up my sports. I want to have that desire for new CDs. I have said in the past that I don't want to be rich because I could have everything I want and would lose that feeling of NOT having something and wanting it. I said I liked and wanted to continue to have that "want." I liked knowing there are still things out ther I can "get." This seems to be a fundamental contradiction to Buddhism.

I remember my former roommate Rob saying something to this degree once.

One more thing: Those of you reading this from a Christian background as myself may have noticed some parallels between the two theologies. The idea of devoted yourself to more "enlightened" things than superficial, "earthly" desires.

And I may be looking at Buddhism too generally as an outsider to Christianity would look at it too broadly. For instance, much of what I am stating may be meant more for those who choose to be more monastic...those who plan to be monks. Like priests in Catholicism. One could look at some of the "requirements" of priests and generalize them to the common Christian and say, "Hey, no. I'm not interested. That's too dedicated." But actually, if they knew more, they may feel differently and more willing. I, very well, may be at that state.

I definitely have more to read.

Fruits of my Labor

I'd like to take this time to publicly congratulate Patrick Connell. He was a fourth grade student of mine during my first year at Linden Elementary. This June he will graduate from high school and move on to the next step in his life.

I am very pleased and honored to have been invited to his graduation. This has been a personal wish I have had since I began teaching. I keep telling my students when they leave my classroom in June to remember me when they graduate and send me an invite. I always promised I would attend. Honestly, I haven't expected to get many takers on my offer. But to really get one? I am truly thrilled. Despite my recent feelings of burned out, disenchanted frustration, I am sincerely excited to attend and support Pat.

More about Pat: He came in like any other fourth grader with more interest in recess or fun or anything other than math or reading. He had a great attitude and personality though. His mom was his driving force. She loved Patrick and wanted the best for him. She came in openly asking for any and all advice I could offer. She followed through with everything I threw at her. She valued his education. It is refreshing for me to write this and remember there are parents out there like her. With his mom's help and his own work, Pat progressed through fourth grade quite well and has successfully moved on through middle and high school.

I look forward to talk to Pat again after commencement and hear his plans. I look forward to listening to that 10 year boy as an 18 year old man speak of what contributions he plans to make. And even though I only played a role in one year of his education, I am going to take some personal pride in it. After all this is why I went into teaching.

And I am not going to allow myself to sit here and beat myself up about the countless other students that have passed through my classroom without receiving the same experience Pat received. Instead I am going to focus on the fact that Pat made it. He was a great kid. And there were plenty of other great kids that I anm sure have followed the same path as Pat and I am going to trust that that is true.

Congrats Pat! Fine job!!

Rest in Peace: Paris Westmoreland of the same class.

Musical Addition

Here's another little quiz for fun:

Nick Mason + Rick Wright + David Gilmour + 1)______ ______ = 2)_______ _______


What belongs in each numbered blank? (each number is two words)
1)
2)

Fear my Family....

Some know this story well. Others have heard it but laugh. More have heard and forgotten. If you do not fall in any of these categories read on and mark this as your warning.

I have capabilities not even I understand yet. It is a power I must use for good and not evil. If I can learn to control it, you better not step in my way.....or my offspring.

Let me begin. Through my entire life I have had dreams. These vivid dreams seem very real. While nothing about this is unusual, many of them come true. I also get "vibes" about things. Again, nothing different than most people but these "vibes" come true more often than not. Of course I believe in my heart that every single human being has this power but does not appreciate it or harness it properly. I have joked in the past about how I am phsycic but as time goes on I really am starting to believe it. Don't forget the phenomenom that is The Huey Karma passed on down from the Matthews side as well.

Now here is the scary part. This you should fear. Over a decade and a half ago the Cleveland Cavaliers (you knew sports would be tied in wouldn't you?) played the New Jersey Nets, Boston Celtics and Chicago Bulls in the playoffs. Each team had a star player that destroyed the Cavs. In the first round, Drazen Petrovic of the Nets lit up the Cavs' defense from behind the arc. It was brutal to watch and I almost lost my mind. I swore up and down that I wanted that man dead or hurt. Fortunately, (or unfortunately to the rest of the world) the Cavs won that series and moved on to Boston. The Celtics had a young rising star in Reggie Lewis. Once again, the Cavs had no answer for the star. Again, I swore up and down that I wanted that man dead or hurt. But the Cavs managed to escape and move on again. Next up were the Chicago Bulls who, as everyone knows, had one of the greatest basketball players of all time in Micheal Jordan. Continuing the pattern, he lit up the Cavs and I swore to the rooftops that this man must be brought down. The Bulls won.

Later that offseason I read the paper and noticed Drazen Petrovic was in a fatal car accident in Germany. "Oh man, that sucks," I thought. "He was in his prime." Then I read that Reggie Lewis had a heart condition. He then passed away as a result. "Oh my. This is tragic," I reflected. Finally, Jordan retired for the first time.

Suddenly I connected the dots. "Oh no! All three of those deaths were players I wanted dead....figuratively!" I felt a shadow of guilt fall over me. Was I the reason they died? Did I cause their death? Did I bring it upon them?

Jordan's deal with the Devil was so strong that not even my secret power could keep him down. He returned to the NBA...twice...and won more NBA rings. But while he escaped death, he couldn't remain in the NBA until he left for his baseball experiment.

Ever since I have tried to keep my mouth censored in my rage against opponents singlehandedly dominating my teams. While I want them to stop, I don't truly want them dead. That is where I draw the line.

This power is not limited to me. My grandfather attended a Cleveland Indians game at the Old Cleveland Municipal Stadium, the Grand Old Lady on the Lake, soon after the Indians won their last World Series. The experience was so bad and the service was so horrible that he left with my grandmother swearing to NEVER return to an Indians game again in that stadium and that they would never win a championship again in THAT stadium. As a result of his boycott he never saw just how even worse the stadium got decades later with troughs for bathrooms and leaking pipes and long poles in the middle of your view. Not to mention the metal seats. But I have my own, nostalgic opinion about that.

Well...the Tribe has yet to win a World Series since. They never won another in that stadium. In fact, they struggled to be competitive until the move to Jacob's Field (now Progressive) in 1994.

Coincidence?

I don't know if I believe in coinciences anymore. Everything just may happen for a reason after all. And the suffering of my fellow fans and those individual players may be the work of my family.

Be afraid. Be very afraid.

(And I am working on getting Pa to lift the Curse of the Tribe. He already said the move was good enough. But I haven't seen a trophy yet.)

Some of my Favorite Posts

My list of posts is growing. I looked back on some of them and thought to myself that there are some really bad, boring, poorly written posts.

But I also noticed some posts I am rather proud of. So I wanted to highlight them in case they have been lost in the pile of posts since. And for those of you reading this blog that didn't in the beginning, please check these out. I feel like they represent me and my intentions for this blog the best.

So here is my shamelessly egocentric list of my stuff:

1) Good Friday
2) Moral Framework
3) Ode to the OG
4) Break the Chain
5) The Huey Karma
6) Fatherhood
7) What's worse than a poser?
8) A little football will cure your ills.....
9) Fan Behavior
10) My Evolution of Spirituality
11 Pandora's Box
12) Being a Better Person
13) Right Vs. Wrong
14) Best and Worst Day of Your Life
15) Insignificance
16) Motivation

And here are some topics I have had swirling around in my head of late. I want to write about them at some point:

Sticking up for those you love....
Buddhism and the Book of Matthew....
Exorcising old demons.....
Sticking to commitments......
Softball....
My affect on others......
Disconnect between parents and teachers and its role in the disintegrating state of public education in America.....
Family curses: Me and my Grandpa....
Going against the mainstream making you part of the mainstream.......