Healthcare

I have a feeling it was "meant to be" that I write this post. I was thinking the other day about writing something in regards to universal healthcare. Then I read my cousin's note on facebook that ignited a rather heated debate with an extremely conservative, priestly colleague of his. My cousin, sister and I joined in this "conversation" regarding universal healthcare or socialized healthcare as this priest in training put it.

My original intention was to write about my observations and thoughts regarding a student of mine who has been out of school for a bit due to her sibling's recent health issue that is identical to what I have been through with my daughter. While I don't want to get into their private matters in a public post like this, I am certain they don't have the same insurance that I am lucky enough to have. But for the sake of discussion, let us just say that there are families in their position who are not insured because we know there are. So here I go in a stream of consciousness style of writing because I have very little substance to share.

How do families liek the one I spoke of above pay for the care they need? I recall being in that very same position in terms of health and all the emotions and thoughts running through my head WITH insurance. No matter how scared I was, I knew my daughter would receive care and I could afford my portion. Despite that I was stressed out and almost in a panic. This poor family. These poor families that must experience that, or worse, and not know where the money is going to come from.

I am speaking from ignorance, but do they even receive the same service? Do they get shortchanged because the doctors and nurses know they can't pay for it? Is this ethical or common? Is this where medicare or medicaid come in?

I realize this post isn't giving answers or opinions as much as asking questions. This is where I am with this right now. I feel horrible for this family and others families like them. Thinking about this makes me think we need to find some way to create viable healthcare for all. But I have no idea where to begin.

There is still part of me that gets frustrated when my tax money meant to help people like these in situations like these gets abused by these people. Or gets abused by the government in charge of passing it out appropriately. So I don't know exactly where I stand. I get tired of standing behind people in line at the corner grocery store across from my school watching them use food stamps ad then using cash to buy 40 ounce malt liquor and cigarettes. Or the food they buy is doughnuts and chips and other junk food. I am not speaking in stereotypes, this is what I see frequently. Am I wrong to judge like this?

Boy oh boy, just looking back on my experience in the healthcare system makes me count my blessings for how lucky I am.

Good Guys vs. Bad Guys

I have noticed something in my first 33 years of life. Being bad is cool. Being good is weak.

Even when someone is the "good guy" there are things about him/her that is bad to try to salvage some respect or credibility. I go back to Star Wars and recall how Han Solo was the cool character while Luke Skywalker was this boyish, naive weaker character who had to grow into his strength. And it took a bad experience or action to get him there. Even then, Solo was still the cool guy everyone wanted to be. Solo was the scoundrel. Luke was pure.

It is much "cooler" or well respected if you are a tough guy that is not good. If somebody represents righteousness they are looked at as weak or naive and unworldly.

Take dating as well. Girls always say they want a good guy and they complain about their bad boyfriends, but at the drop of a dime they will go out with the guy with a dark past or bad background. As I continue with these stereotypes knowing full well there are exceptions to the rule, I may run into issues on the male side. Many times you see the males go for the "good girls." But even in this instance I believe it is because the guys want to stroke their need to be "bad" by being with the "good girl" and therefore coming off as the "bad guy" since they may not be as "good." they may feel some sort of egotistical triumph "conquering" the good girl.

Throughout life you feel this urge to "be bad" or naughty. It can range from harmless to serious. Teenage rebellion is the epitome of this. As a teenager you MUST be bad or rebel against your parents or society or the mainstream-(fill in the blank) to have any sort of credibility. It gets to the point where people are not rebelling because they believe in any sort of thing or because they don't believe in whatever it is they are rebelling against. Instead they are rebelling for the sake of rebelling. In the end they are actually conforming more than rebelling and contradicting themselves entirely.

Before this post get off on a tangent I want to blog about later, let me circle back to the theme here. Being good is boring. Bad is exciting. So as we search for excitement and meaning in life we gravitate to the "bad" guys or the "bad" things.

I grew up identifying with Luke Skywalker and that was my first mistake. I have gone through life trying to be socially acceptable and good at the same time. Therefore, I think I have lost the respect of many people and I am not taken seriously by most people because of this flaw. Think about it. Those of you who know me, do you really think I am a guy you want in your corner in a tough situation? Be careful. Don't take this as a poor me statement and think I want replies listing how you would want me in your corner. Seriously picture yourself in a confrontation and who you'd want there......see? Not me. And I wouldn't either. I'm the guy you call when things are easy. You picture me there when we are at a bar watching the Cavs lose to the Celtics. I'm the guy you think of when you want to talk to somebody about sports. You get my point. When push comes to shove, you want the Han Solo guy. The tough guy. The bad guy.

Of course, as often is the truth, age is the great equalizer. The older we get, the more we realize it is better to be good. We shouldn't smoke anymore. Drugs get you in more trouble than their worth. Drinking to 3 am hurts. Getting in bar fights proves your stupidity more than toughness. Solving your problems in general by fighting is a sign of no intelligence to resolve them better. Bad language is often inappropriate. Kids actually are enjoyable to be around. Helping people feels good. It is important to tell your mom and dad you love them. Lying makes things worse than if you tell the hard truth and deal with the effects. Gossip is for teenyboppers. I could go on.

I don't expect my statements above to be interpreted as holding true with every specific individual. These are generalizations.

LeBron on Vogue Cover

LeBron has found himself in the center of some controversey recently for his picture on the cover of the April 2008 edition of Vogue magazine with Gisele Bundchen, the girlfriend of golden boy Tom Brady. Fortunately this controversey is not of the legal variety or anything that seriously questions LeBron's integrity in my mind. This questions Vogue's integrity before James'.



The problem some people are having with this cover shot is that it has racist overtones. There have been various references to "King Kong." One could see the questionable tone of this picture. You do not have to look hard to get the feel that it is an angry, scary black man victimizing a beautiful, pure white woman. He is screaming and holding her in his arm. He is big and strong. She is beautiful and somewhat fragile in fancy clothes. But I'll be honest, that is not what I thought when I saw the picture.

What I saw was LeBron dribbling a basketball in one hand because that is what he is known for doing. The look is a common one he gives after dunks or big plays. Gisele seems to be along for the ride and enjoying it. She didn't seemed scared or worried. I figured it was what models do. I assumed she was running which made sense if she was with an athlete in a photo shoot.

With that said, I do understand the point of view of those people seeing it in a different light. I wonder if this is a case of hypersensitivity or over-the-top political correctness or really something to worry about. I highly doubt the photographers were going for a King Kongesque cover but one would think somebody in the hallways of Vogue would have picked up on the possibility of the "racist pic" point of view.

I mean I am not any sort of expert. I watch all these reality contest shows with my wife regarding fashion and models and have no clue what is "good" and "bad" and why. They say certain outfits or runway walks or poses are too "this" or too "that" and show a certain feeling or attitude that I don't get at all. When I think something looks well done, I hear how bad it is. I am the same way with art period. So my opinion can't be close to right in this case either since I am "art challenged."

I read an article on MSN.com regarding this cover shot that had a quote saying through the years we always see black men depicted as mean, angry criminals. They picked out several examples. I see where they are going with this and I do notice this throughout the media but we could back and find examples of angry, white rockers on the cover of various magazines looking scary as well. And I bet there are plenty of positive cover shots of black men as well. In fact, LeBron himself has been depicted in pleasant shots numerous times.

Let's be careful of how we show the world different images, but let's not go overboard. I'm eager for opinions on this.

Me and my lack of manliness

As I have progressed through my life I have come to the conclusion I am just not much of a man's man. Most of the time I am ok with it. I even take pride in it at times. Other times I feel inadequate. I have voiced this to my wife on numerous occasions. Ironically, she feels quite the opposite saying that I am "just a typical guy" and most of our disagreements are results of the fact that I am stereotypical man she is a stereotypical woman. You know, battle of the sexes thing.

Well, today she witnessed just what I mean. We are working on the house to improve it. Why now? Well despite living here for 6 years I have done nothing to the house. It needs alot of TLC as they say. Getting my point yet?

Today we did the simple project of putting shelving in the closet to turn it into a much needed pantry. Nothing to it right? Not when Huey is on the case. Anything remotely requiring the manly skill of using tools and building stuff or putting stuff together is a laborious pain in the...

We had to use these things called Mollies. Huh? The lady at Home Depot told us how to use them and I obviously didn't understand as I struggled through the entire afternoon with them. We needed to put up a bar to stablize the shelves. Unfortunately it was too long so we needed it cut. Someone said we could get it cut there. Apparently not. But we could just use a hacksaw the other guy said. Now this is embarassing. I wasn't sure what kind of saw was a hacksaw. Luckily, either did the wife and she asked the guy saving me from my humiliation.

Home Depot just makes me uncomfortable. All this stuff and no idea how to use any of it. Guys working there speaking English to me but using words that I have no clue about. Everybody just assume I know stuff that I don't. And when I go with my wife they always look at me when they explain things. Uhhhh, don't look at me buddy.

Same thing goes with cars. I don't have a freaking clue what anything under the hood is except the windsheild washer fluid place and the oil stick thing. I'll meet guys and they start talking all this car talk and I'm lost. Inevitably after it becomes blatantly obvious I am zoning, they go to the "tits and ass" talk. Ok, I can participate in that, but it just doesn't feel right. I love those qualities in woman but there is a line. Respect maybe.

So anyway, today was a day of inadequacy for me. Maybe tomorrow when I'm on the couch watching the NFL playoffs and eating too many potato chips and longing for an ice cold beer, admiring the looks of the women in the commercials I will feel like more of a "man."