Good Guys vs. Bad Guys

I have noticed something in my first 33 years of life. Being bad is cool. Being good is weak.

Even when someone is the "good guy" there are things about him/her that is bad to try to salvage some respect or credibility. I go back to Star Wars and recall how Han Solo was the cool character while Luke Skywalker was this boyish, naive weaker character who had to grow into his strength. And it took a bad experience or action to get him there. Even then, Solo was still the cool guy everyone wanted to be. Solo was the scoundrel. Luke was pure.

It is much "cooler" or well respected if you are a tough guy that is not good. If somebody represents righteousness they are looked at as weak or naive and unworldly.

Take dating as well. Girls always say they want a good guy and they complain about their bad boyfriends, but at the drop of a dime they will go out with the guy with a dark past or bad background. As I continue with these stereotypes knowing full well there are exceptions to the rule, I may run into issues on the male side. Many times you see the males go for the "good girls." But even in this instance I believe it is because the guys want to stroke their need to be "bad" by being with the "good girl" and therefore coming off as the "bad guy" since they may not be as "good." they may feel some sort of egotistical triumph "conquering" the good girl.

Throughout life you feel this urge to "be bad" or naughty. It can range from harmless to serious. Teenage rebellion is the epitome of this. As a teenager you MUST be bad or rebel against your parents or society or the mainstream-(fill in the blank) to have any sort of credibility. It gets to the point where people are not rebelling because they believe in any sort of thing or because they don't believe in whatever it is they are rebelling against. Instead they are rebelling for the sake of rebelling. In the end they are actually conforming more than rebelling and contradicting themselves entirely.

Before this post get off on a tangent I want to blog about later, let me circle back to the theme here. Being good is boring. Bad is exciting. So as we search for excitement and meaning in life we gravitate to the "bad" guys or the "bad" things.

I grew up identifying with Luke Skywalker and that was my first mistake. I have gone through life trying to be socially acceptable and good at the same time. Therefore, I think I have lost the respect of many people and I am not taken seriously by most people because of this flaw. Think about it. Those of you who know me, do you really think I am a guy you want in your corner in a tough situation? Be careful. Don't take this as a poor me statement and think I want replies listing how you would want me in your corner. Seriously picture yourself in a confrontation and who you'd want there......see? Not me. And I wouldn't either. I'm the guy you call when things are easy. You picture me there when we are at a bar watching the Cavs lose to the Celtics. I'm the guy you think of when you want to talk to somebody about sports. You get my point. When push comes to shove, you want the Han Solo guy. The tough guy. The bad guy.

Of course, as often is the truth, age is the great equalizer. The older we get, the more we realize it is better to be good. We shouldn't smoke anymore. Drugs get you in more trouble than their worth. Drinking to 3 am hurts. Getting in bar fights proves your stupidity more than toughness. Solving your problems in general by fighting is a sign of no intelligence to resolve them better. Bad language is often inappropriate. Kids actually are enjoyable to be around. Helping people feels good. It is important to tell your mom and dad you love them. Lying makes things worse than if you tell the hard truth and deal with the effects. Gossip is for teenyboppers. I could go on.

I don't expect my statements above to be interpreted as holding true with every specific individual. These are generalizations.