Importance of Fathers

With each new school year I look ahead to what themes and personal goals I have for a new crop of students. Obviously, I become curious about how the group will mesh and how well they will buy into my methodology and style of teaching. Each group takes on a personality of its own. There are the usual individuals that fall into the usual stereotypes and there are always the wildcards. The key to any class as a whole is whether I can get the wildcards to buy what I'm selling. They usually represent the critical mass that determines whether the group is a "good" crew or "difficult" crew. I quote those terms because sometimes good doesn't necessarily translate to fun or enjoyable and many times difficult classes can be the most fun or rewarding. Teaching is never a black and white thing.

Regardless of any of these factors, questions and observations, one thing continues to hold steadfast. The stress I endure, the quality of life I live for the period of each individual school year can be correlated to the presence of Fathers in the lives of my students. I have become a firm believer in the importance of Dads.


I am not the only one in this school of thought. According to Fatherhood Institute, "A recent systematic review of studies....found ‘positive’ father involvement associated with a range of desirable outcomes for children and young people." (http://www.fatherhoodinstitute.org) This is from an article describing studies that have proven my point. Here they list the findings of a Father's presence.

By no means do I mean to diminish the importance of Mothers. I would like to think it goes without saying that Mothers are the most important factor in a person's life. Women in general are the foundation of our civilization and well being as well as the success of our society as a whole in my mind.

While in some cases Dads are playing more influential roles in their children's lives these days, it's not happening everywhere. In the area where I teach there are often absentee fathers. I won't hold any punches here, there are just flat out, 100% irresponsible boys making babies and hauling out of dodge leaving the woman in a precarious position.

Having spent a decade teaching in an urban setting, I would like to draw upon my personal experience here. I assume there are the same types of Fathers in suburban and rural areas as well. Also, there are other ways Fathers can be absentee to their children. Coming home from work and heading straight to the couch as they crack open their beer and watch the game every night doesn't make you much better. Yes, you may provide for your family, but these days call for more. Picking your kids up on your visitation weekends and taking them to Gameworks, filling their pockets with tokens while you sit at the bar doesn't count either. Sending in a child support check each week isn't enough either.

I can't sit here and judge every Dad out there. I understand some men can only do so much with what they have. There is usually more to a story than what you see on the surface. So let me return to my original objective here and focus on my classroom and my students from my experience.

Last year's crop of fourth graders may have been one of my better classes. My growing bitterness towards teaching wasn't indicative on how I enjoyed 95% of those kids. Overall, this group had more confidence, displayed more positive social skills, had better attitudes and behaved better than other classes in the past. This class also had more Fathers attend parent teacher conferences, call me with questions, show up to pick up their children, follow up on concerns I mentioned, and were referred to by their children or Mothers as a source or option in case I needed one. I highly doubt this is a coincidence.

Not every Father who came in was wearing a suit. Most did not. Not every Father spoke articulately and came in with a college degree. Some of the Fathers worked second shift and could not answer the phone right after school or come in to talk to me easily. But every single one of those Dads made it a point that I heard from them. Each one, in my mind, was making a HUGE, important, positive difference in their child's life. Shoot, they made a big difference in my life making it much easier and less stressful. Seriously, there was plenty of stress to go around with the other students who had no Father around to find.

In past years I have not had this many Fathers present or at least as vocal. Many of those classes were not as "good." The trend I am noticing continues to hold true year in and year out. Present Fathers lead to better lives for their kids (from the point of view of their teacher anyway). I have another post coming soon about the devaluing of teachers, but I think one way to help us and value us as professionals is to vigilantly campaign for Fathers to play major roles in their kids lives and educations. Those of us who are Fathers need to be vigilant in the job we do with our children every minute of every day and our role in their education. According to Fatherhood Institute, "One high quality study demonstrated that a father’s interest in his child’s education is one of the most important factors governing the qualifications he or she will grow up to have in adult life – more important than family background, the child’s individual personality, or poverty." (http://www.fatherhoodinstitute.org/index.php?id=12&cID=583) There are so many factors that play a role in students' success, but Fathers are at the top of the list.

My principal has a quote posted in the mail room that says the single most important factor in student achievement is the teacher. I can't disagree with this and I know she is coming from a good place, but the more I think about it, the more I think that the Father may be just as critical.