For the rest of you, I keep hearing plenty of hate from anti-OSU people here in Columbus or just about anywhere on the Internet even when the topic or thread has nothing to do with us. Obviously, it is because we are so freaking successful and our fans are pretty freaking obnoxious about it.
Of course we like to call it passion. You say tomato, we say tomato.
So in honor of all the sports hate that seems to be the trend these days, I give you my top ten list of most hated sports "stuff."
10. Glamour City Bias
From Colin Cowherd to just about any fan that doesn't live in the midwest, sports fans around the country adore the teams who play in sunny, warm cities or cities with big lights and plenty of superficial glam. The players are becoming more and more the same as they sign with these teams leaving smaller markets out to dry. Economics play a large role in this too. But in the name of my hate list, I will disregard that.
9. Notre Dame
Originally I couldn't stand Notre Dame because they were so good and I was tired of them. It was a hate rooted in envy. Then they started to suck. Now they have sucked for almost 20 years. In the middle of this span of suck, people still talked about them as though they were relevant when they weren't. Any other school playing like they did would not even register on ESPN's "other notable games" segments. But they continued to make headlines. So my hate was less out of jealousy and more out of fatigue and annoyance of the obvious bias.
They used to be higher on this list but have sunk near the bottom because I am starting to think I would like for them to be good again. They do have a rich tradition and they have done their time in suckdom. So now is a good time to return to true relevance and add to the lore of college football's history.
8. Mark May
Any fellow Buckeye fan knows exactly why he has made this list. He entered Buckeye Hater lore back in 2002 when he and Trev Alberts led the charge of over rated claims in the national media regarding the undefeated Buckeyes. Apparently, wins meant less than the style of play or point differential in wins. They repeatedly heralded Iowa as the better Big Ten team even though Iowa wasn't even the better Iowa team!! They lost to Iowa State early in the year.
But my Buckeyes showed him and every other doubter that year that the slow and outdated Big Ten team was the elite as they physically beat down the glitzy and overpaid U to win in the best football game I have ever and will ever watch.
7. The Mythical Torture in Chicago
Growing up a fan of Cleveland sports, nobody and I mean NOBODY has any right whatsoever to tell us about sports misery or pain. Yet, Chicago with the dominating 85 Bears, the glory years with the Bulls during the Jordan seasons and the recent titles from the Blackhawks and White Sox continue to act as though that Cubs streak trumps everything.
Two words: SHUT UP!
6. Detroit
The Tigers. The Pistons. The fact they exist in that state up north.
5. Cincinnati Bengals
I don't include the whole city because they share my state. Many are Buckeye fans. And I like the Reds. Always have. But the hillbilly Bungle fans, in particularly from south of the river in Kentucky and small towns that dot southern Ohio, are some of the most annoying and laughable fans I have ever come across. The thing is, they may be the only football fans whose pro team sucks more than mine. Well, the Lions may trump us both but I already listed Detroit.
4. Miami
As recently as 15 months ago this probably wouldn't even be on the list let alone appear in the top five ahead of in state rival Cincy. But one man managed to shoot this city and everything it represents up this high. He magnified the other little things I can't stand about Miami as well.
There are only two teams (both will soon register on this list) that I get more joy out of seeing lose. There is no way they can lose too badly or painfully. Watching the Mavs destroy their chances at a title last season was wonderful. Watching the NBA lockout continue is beautiful even if it is cutting my nose off despite my face with the Cavs suffering a lack of a season as well. Longer lockout, less of him.
The Marlins broke my heart in Game 7 of the World Series in 1997. The U is one of the most annoying programs on Earth. So freaking flashy and loud and obnoxious. Not to mention filled with thugs and low character individuals that make a glorified garage sale for tats seem like child's play. Fortunately, my Crimson Tide took them out in 1991 and, as mentioned in #8, my Buckeyes took them out in 2002. So I have had some pay back.
But in the end, they represent the hatred I listed in #10 with their South Beach attitude and party lifestyle.
I hate that superficial crap.
Of course I am in the minority and the people I need to feel the same as me in order for my teams to win, don't see eye to eye with me in this either. So once again, the envy factor kicks in even though I have no urge whatsoever to live that way myself and love my life in the midwest.
3. Pittsburgh Steelers
I have a deep rooted disdain for this team. While many Top lists you read are prisoners of the moment and rank recent buzz worthy entries higher on the list than they really belong, I give longevity a good bit of weight. It takes a franchise changing reason (see #4 over #5) for a recently hated team to beat out teams I have hated for a long time.
The Steelers are everything I wish my football team would be but isn't. They are a tough, bad weather, well run organization that consistently wins and remains relevant.
Man I hate them.
The mere sight of those uniforms or that Hines Ward smile makes me want to puke.
2. Baltimore Ravens
They took my most beloved team. What more needs to be said? Then they go and win a Super Bowl while my team that we fought to have back has pretty much sucked ever since. They have stolen the rivalry with the Steelers because we suck too much to make it worthwhile to the Steelers. It is similar to the OSU v. Michigan rivalry.
Is Art Modell still alive? Because I don't like that guy. But I won't say anything too negative about a man in his position in life if he is.
Also, they are an in division rival like Pittsburgh and Cincy so the natural competitive hate exists there too. I don't respect this organization like I do the Steelers though. It is not a respectful hate. It is straight up hatred hate.
Drum roll please.......
Think you know?
1. The Whole State of Michigan
With Detroit already taken care of, let me focus on the university in Ann Arbor. I can't stand the maize and blue. I hate those helmets. I will never forget the heartbreak they put me through in the 90s while I was a student at THE Ohio State University ruining multiple title hopes and rubbing our face in it every time. Desmond Howard and his Heisman Pose. Charles Woodson. Tim Biakabutuka ( I don't even care if I spelled his name right because I can't stand him or that team) causing an argument between me and my dad.
This past decade of dominance over them is not enough. The epic victory in 2006 is not enough pay back. I never want to lose to this school.
Ever.
In addition, the stupid Fab 5 in hoops. Hate them too.
But we can't forget the other school in this horrid, hideous state over in East Lansing. They may not have a long list of reasons for me to hate them, but 1998 is all it takes. That was heartbreaking enough to almost make the list on its own merit as its own entry. That walk back to my apartment that evening was a LONG, painful experience. The rare season in the 90s that the other school didn't ruin our title hopes, MSU made sure to pick up the slack.
I'm shaking right now just thinking about it.
Honorable mention: Micheal Jordan, John Elway, USC, Boston and Colin Cowherd.
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